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Thank you to everyone who came to our benefit party!

And a particular thanks to our performers and volunteers:

Our ace party-planning dynamo, El Beh

Magician Christian Cagigal

Magician Luigi Anzivino

Auctioneer Jason Brock

Pianist Tal Ariel

The Matinees

DJ Anne Allison

Ray Oppenheimer

Greg Wrenn

Maryssa Wanlass

Kelli Zehnder

Cassidy Jamahl Brown

Sandra Pulley

Eve Uberman

Mugwumpin is "reinventing the very model of a theatre season"--read more!
Main | And we're off! »
Wednesday
Feb202013

Proclaiming joy

I might get gushy.

Rehearsal ended in the usual ways tonight: bleary eyes, a final push to run something one more time, and then my little why-does-rehearsal-fly-by-so-fast dance. It was a not-so-cold night, and I didn’t feel like waiting for BART.  I swung my leg over my bike and took the 5-mile straight shot down San Pablo towards my home on Lake Merritt.

My brain tends to be wound tight in rehearsal, and then slowly unspools after it ends.  I felt this process as a physical sensation tonight.  The Great Big Also is a big, complicated show with an absurd number of variables to track.  As the air rushed past me and I dodged potholes, I released each thread I was holding in my mind, one at a time.  Often this process leaves me with a blankness that is rather pleasant; I’ll soon be ready for bed.  But tonight, a strong feeling remained behind.  I stretched my arms out wide as I rode, letting go of the handlebars. What was this feeling? I breathed deep. Gratitude.

I am so grateful for the gift of this show.  I’ve loved (almost) every minute of making this crazy beast.  I’m even more grateful for the collaborators who have made the show with me.  Their huge hearts pound out their generosity and fearlessness, scary strong.  I’m grateful when Joe and I can’t figure out what’s supposed to happen in a particular moment, and then the same idea flies from both our mouths.  I’m grateful Mina and Megan, our asskick stage managers, furiously roll up sheets of Tyvek all around us.  I'm grateful for the daily magic and grace this work brings. I’m grateful that Teddy knows where we’re starting from before we do and already has the sound of the bell cued up.  I’m grateful for how Michael sinks into a note I’ve given, suddenly filling out a moment with life.  I’m grateful for how, even though I know that she is going to do it, I’m startled when Susannah drops into a deep chesty voice.

Mostly I’m grateful that I get to be doing this.  I get to make this intricately detailed world with people I love and respect, and then invite people into it.  It’s hard fucking work, and I’m barely able to type these words I’m so exhausted.  And I am so goddamn glad. 

Mark Eitzel sings, “It is important throughout your life to proclaim your joy.”  He’s right.

-Chris

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